"Mirror, Mirror on the wall . . . where did he go, and why doesn't he call?"

Rejection and the Human Spirit

Have you ever noticed . . . nothing, I repeat nothing, can kill the human spirit faster than rejection. I notice it all around me. Not with me, personally. I'm speaking of rejection in very broad terms here. Rejection in general. Rejection from classmates, rejection by family, rejection from neighbors, rejection from school, rejection from groups, rejection from relationships (both of love and/or friendship), rejection from society, rejection from assistance, rejection from employees, rejection from employers, rejection from creditors, rejection from potential mates . . .

My Lord, look at all the rejection we live with, and tolerate, these days. It swirls around us like a negative, foggy haze. Many of us act as if we are immune to it, but are we really? I don't think so.

You see, the devastating effects of rejection . . . the affects of negativity, are far reaching. Rejection reaches deep into the human psyche and its affect reveals itself in strange, often odd ways. The human mind, the human spirit is a fragile one. Rejection can damage people to such extents mentally that, often times, the physical manifestation of it can lead to personal illness - both physical and mental. We truly are a fragile species and rejection does damage on many levels.

Let's look at what rejection creates or "manifests:"

- It creates the cycle of blame
- It creates the cycle of self destructive punishment
- It creates a sense of isolation
- It creates anger
- It creates negativity

Now let's look at what rejection destroys:

- It destroys confidence
- It destroys morale
- It destroys self-esteem
- It destroys your human spirit
- It destroys your soul on a deep psychological level

Rejection = destruction of the human spirit + manifestation of anger and negativity.

If we live in a reality that is constantly "manifesting" itself based on our inner thoughts, visions, desires and intentions . . . and are surrounded and saturated by constant negativity - then that means we are living in a current reality manifested by the effects of rejection.

We are living in a reality that is the manifestation of rejection - the destruction of the human spirit and the creation of anger.

As humans, our species is a social one. The popularity of new social media technologies over the last few years is and example of just how social a species mankind really is. But have we forgotten that, folks? It's ironic to me that such a primally social species "rejects" one another so very often in everyday life.

Where's the love and acceptance? Where's the gratitude?

Love, acceptance and gratitude promote "growth." The manifestation of the positive energy promotes growth on many levels:

- spiritual growth
- mental growth
- evolutionary growth of soul and spirit
- growth of compassion
- growth of positive decision making

And if the power of positive energy can have such wondrous effects on mankind and our surroundings (because we are always "manifesting" our thoughts, wishes and desires daily) . . . then what kind of effect do you think negativity has on mankind and our civilization?

Negativity hinders growth, and what little growth that comes out of it, only promotes total destruction in the end. The things that rejection and negativity manifest are destructive by nature in and of themselves.

Negative energy hinders:

- spiritual growth
- mental growth
- the evolutionary growth of mankind
- decision making
- compassion

And in a civilization where mankind has taken to rejecting one another so often, the "manifestations" of that society as a whole - are hindered. Negativity doesn't promote growth and rejection is negativity.

Is this really what we want for our society? For our civilization and our species? For our children and our futures? I think NOT. I don't want to live within a reality that was built upon and/or hindered by the destructive forces and manifestations of negativity.

These days, everyone's running around seeking out their own personal happiness. And many times, at great expense to themselves, personally. Selfishness can bring about "loss" and there are a lot of selfish individuals out there these days. And amazingly enough - no matter how high and low you search, no matter what you've given up or to what extent you suffered loss over it -no one seems to be able to find this elusive thing called "happiness." I think I know why.

I believe the reason everyone is still "seeking" as opposed to "finding" true happiness is because they are blind as to what truly makes the human spirit happy, fulfilled and content.

It's love, folks. Love, acceptance and compassion. It's so simple of an answer to such a big question, that it's all to easily overlooked these days. I challenge you all. I challenge each and everyone of you who read this to test yourselves.

Test your human spirit to find out what makes you feel truly your happiest:

First) Indulge YOURSELF. Go to the store. Buy something special for yourself. Or do something special for yourself. Something that you think will bring you happiness or something that you've been waiting for. Or go about the game of manipulation somehow. Take advantage of someone, cheat someone or fudge a tale or inflate a story to cover your own ass or make yourself look better in someone elses eyes. Indulge in drug use or alcoholism (and please realize I'm being sarcastic here, folks). Do "whatever it takes" - this is where you get to be selfish and self indulgent. (This is what most people think brings true happiness.)

After you have done something to indulge yourself: take note as to how you felt, and for how long you felt that way.

Next) Do something for OTHERS. Help your elderly neighbor. Repair something for them, pull their weeds or cut their grass. Or surprise someone you love or admire with an unexpected gift. Maybe feed someone who has gone hungry or donate your time to foster children who have been abandoned. Take in an animal that has been abandoned and rejected. Give your spouse or your children that loving pet they've always wanted but you would never allow them to get because of your own unwillingness to take on additional responsibilities. Finally stop fighting with someone over something trivial. Apologize to someone and make amends. Be "secret santa" for the day and help a needy individual by giving them $4o out of your pocket for no real reason other than - you wanted to.

After you have done something for others: take note as to how you felt, and for how long you felt that way.

Lastly) Compare notes. If you do this, I am almost certain that you will have found the experience and meaning of true happiness. And for the first time, you will know, and now come to the epiphany of "realizing" what that feels like. You will have achieved a state of "Awareness" - a measure of personal, spiritual and evolutionary growth.

And in your enlightened state, please do come back here and share your experience with all of us in the comments field below. Let's spread positive growth, stories of happiness and gratitude - and begin to manifest a new reality for our civilization through example.

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Peter said...


I very much enjoyed reading this and considering past experiences. I can accept rejection(I get better over time) but some forms of rejection are worse than others I think.

For example rejection from a friend who you suddenlyhave romantic feelings for is to me one of the worst rejections. They know you well enough that the rejection feels likes a rejction of "who you are". Where as others who you may flat out ask for a date simply don't know you that well, there could be a number of factors why they said no.

I'm earning that its best to approach rejection with a "Prepare for the best,Train for the worst" mentality. If I have a solid way of dealing with rejection and I know I can do it confidently it impacts my feeling making approaches. I find its very calming knowing that you can already handle it if plan A fails.

The Mirror of Aphrodite said...

I understand what you're saying. And I think the thing that makes it worse is - you're not only suffering the loss of a romantic interest, you're suffering the loss of a friendship as well.

And yes, the combined effect of that can sting.

And I agree with your approach. If you're already prepared for it, if it happens, the blow isn't so bad.

And if you approach and instead you are accepted, it can feel like Cloud 9 :-)

Anonymous said...

Rejection as Opportunity

Firstly I'd like to say
"never allow anyone to dictate to you who you are"

Rejection is opportunity to become more creative
"ok, they didn't like that idea, back to the drawing board"
Rejection can also make someone become determined to set an example, prove a point, change the world.
Rejection can make you ask yourself "Was I really a jerk?" Opportunity to take a personal inventory of your actions.
Rejection from a lover is a powerful tool.
You can look at is as "wow, I think they just saved me from what could be a terrible relationship, thank them for recognizing it and move on. Also it can make you look carefully at your options in other directions as well in inner fears. Because if rejection brings FEAR, that should be the study of course. Fears make people do terrible things. If rejection leads to depression, then a specialist should be consulted.
Rejection not only helps and heals it's a necessary right of passage that eventually leads to the authentic self and hearing grandpa say
"dust of your shoulders and don't look back"
Who was the salesman who said, "I want to hear that you were rejected 100 times today"
I guess the 101 cold call seals the deal. It's all the NO's that makes the YES worth it.

But just on a word of caution:
If you continue to pursue a lover to the point of stalking, that's FEAR of anything but the lover you pursue. It's childhood based not adult world based. That needs a professional or three.

Anonymous said...

Good post. God will never reject you and that's all that matters in the end.

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